- That the amount of mucus coming out of my right nostril should counteract the extreme dryness of my left. Unfortunately, it's not going to work that way.
- That trying to form a coherent, consistent thought out of my brain is like...oh look, there's a puppy.
- That the only people who should sniffle as much as I do are sick people and cokeheads. I'm too fat to be doing coke.
- That I should watch what I say around my children, even when joking. It's hard to explain to my son what "Hot, Three-way Action" is out of context.
- That the main problem with Halls™ is that they make everything you eat or drink afterwards taste just like Halls™. Not the sort of flavor I was looking for. Not since I quit chugging cough syrup for the codeine.
- That maintaining my sunny disposition despite wanting to collapse in a heap has been my biggest accomplishment today. (I think the drugs offer heaps of assistance.)
- That "Rolling up my Rim" and winning a coffee has become the new highlight of my day.
- That if those are my two biggest highlights - I really need some help.
- That this summer - I'm trying out flip-flops.
- That's it's been a long time since I've done a list.
Song on My Mind - "Bang the Doldrums" By fall out boy. (Go ahead, Joe - laugh.)
Reading - "The writing on the bottom of the NyQuil bottle" By Me.