Thursday, May 31, 2007

Who's The Man In The Suit?

For my Birthday the Sidekick got me something I really wanted.

Volumes 1& 2 of Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law.

If you've never seen this show, you are missing out.
Correction: If you are over the age of 27 and haven't seen this show, you are missing out. - If under, you won't have a fucking clue as to who half these people are.

Take classic Hanna-Barbera characters, smoke a bunch of pot and write a cartoon. This is what you would get. The only show that consistently makes me laugh as hard and often would be Futurama. (And it's losing the battle so far.)

I really like how it completely skewers the childhood memories I had of shows like Scooby-Doo and Super Friends. It takes everything I remember and dimly recall, flips it over and fucks it sideways. (That's really the best description/complement I can offer.)

Thanks, Buddy for making me laugh.

I can't wait until July 24th - Volume 3 hits the shelves.

"Get ready to feel the power.....of attorney!"


Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Waking Up Is Hard To Do.

I've got a new mattress.

I've had it for a couple of days now and I'm finding one rather large problem with it: I can't seem to get out of the damn thing in the morning.

My old mattress was over 14 years old. I might as well have been sleeping on cardboard and thumbtacks. I would spring out of bed in the morning only because it was sheer pain to stay in it any longer. My back hurt, my neck hurt and just moving for the first five minutes was torture.

Thus the New Mattress.

Pocket Coils, Euro Top, and massive amounts of Memory Foam make getting my ass out of bed extremely difficult. Why spring out of bed when I can just roll over painlessly and go back to sleep? Why should I ever leave this cocoon of warmth and comfort?

Fuck the World - I'm staying in bed.

At least until I have to pee.


Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Graphic Expression.

Never has one comic strip so expressed my day.
It's today's strip oddly enough - I glanced at it while reading the paper during my coffee break from madness.
Coincidence that it was there? Karma? Fate?

Whatever it was, it's bang on.


Monday, May 28, 2007

Technological Throwback

I'm always surprised at people who aren't aware of how the world around them works.

Now I can sympathize with the elderly, who can't be expected to have great insight into every modern breakthrough. If you were a kid and T.V hadn't been invented yet, you get a free pass in my books - I'm just glad you can find your way around. (And amazed that you found my blog.)

But everyone else? You all drive me crazy.

I've dealt with two or three people in the past week who don't understand how a bank machine works. One lady thought that even though the machine denied her cash request because of insufficient funds - it would spit the money out after she left. I had to convince her that the machine wouldn't - nay, couldn't do that - and I don't think she believed me. (I must have really wanted her 40 bucks.)

Trying to explain to someone that their card doesn't work in the debit machine because the line is down from their bank to our bank - it's only temporary, but they'll have to use another method of payment: "What do you mean the line is down, the Bank is just over there!" (Points down the road.)

The impression that I get is that some people just think it's all Magic. It's almost like a technological Dark Age and those who know how things work are the new Wizards of the world. I don't think it's necessary to know the inner workings of a computer or be able to draw advanced schematics of the space shuttle, but just know how the basic things in your life operate. I'm shocked at the amount of people who couldn't care less how it works - they just expect it to work. (Have fun troubleshooting your HDTV setup, buddy)

At least keep the forks away from the outlets at home.

Or maybe not, you'd be doing us all a favor.....


Sunday, May 27, 2007

Not Tonight, I've Got A Headache.

No thoughts are brewing due to Brain Shutdown and Re-Construction.

The highways and by ways of my Mind will be back in service tomorrow.

We apologize for any inconvenience.

Pleased stay turned to this channel for further updates.

We turn you back to your regular program of YouTube and Porn.


Saturday, May 26, 2007




It doesn't look good any way you spell it.

35 years ago today the Twin and I were thrust upon the world. It's never been the same since.

I was going to try and do what the Sidekick did and list the things I've learned in my life over the last 35 years. But if you've read this blog all along, you'll realize that there isn't that much that I have learned. I'm still trudging along, making it up as I go. I haven't learned anything so much as I've picked up some colorful anecdotes on what not to do.

But the best advice I've learned?

Don't not do it.

Grammatically, it sucks - but realistically it makes sense. Do what you can when you can do it. You'll kick yourself more looking back and realizing what you didn't do than you will look back and shake your head for what you did do. I don't live by this rule consistently enough myself - and that's one thing I do regret.

I'll go blow out my candles now - it might take two deep breaths.
Wish me luck.


Friday, May 25, 2007

30 Years Ago Today...

  • I found out about Mos Eisley. I never knew a more wretched hive of scum and villainy existed.
  • Was the first time I ever heard about power converters - I still don't see what all the whining is about.
  • I saw Han shoot first - you can't take that away from me, George.
  • I envied my brother's asthma, just because he sounded like a Dark Lord of The Sith.
  • I stopped wanting that cap-gun from the back of the comic books and started saving up for a lightsaber.
  • I think I got my first chubby. Possibly when Princess Lies was all wet in the garbage compacter. (White dress, anyone?)
  • I wanted to bulls eye womp rats in my T-16. I didn't have a T-16 or any idea what a womp rat looked like.
  • I made a point to find out what a "parsec" was.
  • I found out about height requirements for Stormtroopers.
  • I was exposed to the most influential movie of my generation.

I know I was only 5 when it came out. I did get to see it in theaters though. One of my greatest childhood memories.
Never has one movie affected so many for so long. Love it or hate it, you can't deny it's influence and success. Forget what has come after, be it good (Empire) or bad (Jar Jar), just take a moment to appreciate it for what it is: a damn fun movie.

Thanks Flannel Man, and may The Force be with you.


Thursday, May 24, 2007

Hell Is Other People's Children.

Note to the lady with the screaming child: Leave Now.

I understand that you probably need groceries - that's why you are here. I even understand and can sympathize with your embarrassment as your 5 year-old takes items from your cart and throws them on the floor or at the shelves.

But just ignoring what the kid is doing isn't really teaching him anything. By pretending that what he's doing doesn't bother you, all you are doing is reinforcing the fact that there are no consequences for his actions. Taking him out of the store and away from the things he's screaming about will not only show him that he can't get away with acting like that in a public place, it will also help my ears and the ears of the other customers in the general area.

Passive Parenting doesn't work. I can't even begin to understand how people can feel that it's the way to go when raising their children. You have to react to what your kids are doing and saying. You have to show them where the line is between acceptable and unacceptable behavior. As much as I'd like to run SuperNanny's little British car off the road - I have to admit she's right.

People like my kids - I get compliments on them and their behavior all the time. Why do people like my kids? Because they are polite and well mannered, yet they are still kids. They aren't vicious hell-raisers and they aren't automated robots either. Do they try my patience? Oh God, yes, but that's why I'm their parent - they try my patience so that they don't do it to anyone else.

So reminder to the lady with the screaming child - I don't care what you do, as long as you do something.



Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Failing Upwards.

Ever heard of the Peter Principle?

I'm pretty sure the entire concept is based off of a guy I work with.

I'll be the first to admit - my job isn't very hard. If you have a good demeanor, customer skills, and simple organizational ability you'll do just fine. (The basic parts of my job involve nothing more than that. The management stuff - it takes a bit more.)

The guy who is below me in the chain of command is also the guy who takes care of my section when I'm not there or when I'm being used in another area of the store. All he does is work that one section - it's all he's done for four years.

Yet he still has problems making simple decisions or just taking charge of a situation. I've tried to give him support and feedback, and even told him to just run it like I'm not there - yet he still doesn't get it. I've tried to help him with his organization - tried to make life as simple as possible - yet it just doesn't work. He can't seem to rise above that level of competence. I'd like for him to be able to run the section so I can go do something else, but it's like even that little bit of responsibility just makes him freeze like a deer in the headlights.

I think I'll keep trying, but it just gets so frustrating at times. I like the guy as a person - He's great to work with and he does work hard - he just doesn't work smart. And that is tough to tolerate on a long term basis.

I'm not at the point of stabbing him in the eye - yet.
But if you see him with an eye patch, you'll know I've had enough.


Tuesday, May 22, 2007

American Idle.

As I sit here and type this, my wife is watching the American Idol finale in the next room. Who will win? I could really care less.

The first year of American Idol I found somewhat entertaining. I don't watch any of that stuff from the beginning - I hate the part where shitty singers try to pass themselves off as vocalists - I don't find it entertaining at all. I haven't watched more than 5 minutes of any episode since the second season.

They should really make it a challenge. It doesn't even matter who wins anymore. The top 3 or 4 all release records anyway, so what exactly is the prize? Wasn't it supposed to be the big record deal? Now that they all have it, doesn't that cheapen the effort? So now 15 minutes of fame has become 15 episodes - there's little difference.

I think that only two of the winners have gone on to lasting success - at least so far. Carrie Underwood cornered the country market and Kelly Clarkson - well, she's the original, so she's the one we expected to do well. Clay Aiken is probably giving hand-jobs behind the Am/Pm while Ruben guzzles Nacho cheese straight from the pump. Who can even recall who any of the other winners are now? Not Me.

Needless to say, I can't wait for this show to run it's course. I hope that it dies soon. (It probably won't though - it makes too much goddamn money.) Then people can achieve fame the old fashioned way - by fucking record producers.


Monday, May 21, 2007

Wiiness Envy.

So I bought a Wii.

I know I mentioned getting one before, and I even predicted that I would get one before I got my desperately-wanted Xbox 360. It turns out that I was right after all. (Shows me not to ever doubt myself.)

I haven't had much time to play it yet, having only created a Mii and played some Baseball in WiiSports. (My Mii is hot and sexy for the ladies, just in case you wanted to know.) I 'm going to hook up the Wi-Fi and see what all the fuss is about with the "Channels". I might even be able to blog from the comfort of my couch.! Joy!

Why did it get the Wii instead of waiting and getting the 360? Cost and impatience were the two main factors. I knew I wanted one, and I had saved enough money for it, so I just went and got it. I'll just start putting my poker winnings towards the 360 now. The other deciding factor is that I don't have an HDTV yet. I want to experience the 360 in full 1080p glory. The Wii looks great on regular T.V. (As soon as I get the T.V. you'll hear me moaning about mot having the 360.)

I'm happy with the purchase, and only have a small amount of Buyer's Remorse. (That's unusual.) I'll probably rave all about it at a later date, but right now I have to get this set up and running.

Right now it's all about Mii.


Sunday, May 20, 2007

The Cinderella Of My Generation.

I'm in pain.

I hope all of you appreciate the suffering I'm going through.

Tonight at work I had to clean up some broken glass. (My fault - we won't get into the details.) It wasn't a problem, except that I got a microscopic sliver of glass impeded in the fleshy pad of my index finger.

It's my right index finger, which sucks because that's the finger I do everything with. I'm all right until I actually do something with my finger (like type) and then it grates into my body with excruciating pain. (I'm a man though, so I don't cry.) It's pretty annoying.

I've tried to dig it out, but my aged and decrepit eyes keep failing me. I can't squint that long with out getting a screaming headache. I've resigned to letting it get infected, and then having someone cut it off. I believe that is the best course of action.

I know the title is misleading, as it's a glass sliver and not a glass slipper, but that's too fucking bad. If I want to misuse my metaphors because I'm in extreme pain, you'll all just have to like it.

If the infection goes gangrenous and I pass on, I bequeath the sliver to The Sidekick. Someone shove it in his finger so he'll be next.

I'm going to try digging this thing out one more time.
I might go the Rambo route and just cauterize the damn thing.
Wish me luck.


Saturday, May 19, 2007


I have a slight confession.

I wasn't a Transformers fan in the past.

I was more G.I. Joe - and playing with robots that pretended to be cars and stereos seemed a little retarded to me. (The G.I. Joe cartoon was far superior to the Transformers one, and that did help influence my decision precess.) But I tolerated the robots intrusion into my Saturday mornings, and G.I Joe needed to kick somebody's ass, so why not a robot? It all worked out in the end.

Cut to 20 years later.

I have an appreciation for the Transformers and thier place in early Eighties cartoons and toys. I'm not the rabid fanboy that some are, (Sidekick) but I do know the lore and can see what others find so appealing about it. I had heard that there was going to be a live action Transformers movie - I'd even seen some pictures. I wasn't too impressed.

Then I saw This.

It seems really cool, and gives me hope.

Hope that maybe there will be a kick-ass G.I. Joe movie after.
(Fuckin' Robots.)


Friday, May 18, 2007

Things I Hated About The Eighties.

  • Neon Apparel.
  • Mullets (Even though I had one.)
  • Tight-rolled Jeans.
  • Those camo pants with pockets on the knees.
  • The Calgary Flames. (1989)
  • MC Hammer. (Those fuckin' pants)
  • The Cosby Show. (Yet I love Jello Pudding Pops. Go figure.)
  • Breakdancing. (Yes, I did this too.)
  • That E.T. video game.
  • Having to take out my Nintendo cartridge and blow on it six times just to get the goddamn thing to load Excitebike.
  • Stryper. (If you don't know, I can't tell you.)
  • Rock Stars all dressing up like girly hippies from the Roller Derby. (Seriously - shoulder pads? On Motley Crue?)
  • Witness (Han Solo with the Amish? What's going on?)
  • Howard The Duck.
  • That guy's hair from Flock of Seagulls.
  • Shoes with zippered pockets that didn't hold shit.
  • Girls - If you wanted Patrick Swayze from Dirty Dancing you should put out like Jennifer Grey did. Then I'll dance for ya.
  • Rubik's Cube.
  • Puberty.


Thursday, May 17, 2007

Just Run It.

I have a horrible habit when it comes to Poker.

If it ever happens that I fold a hand, (and I do, occasionally) I like to run the cards anyway and see how it turned out. Sometimes this is a good thing and sometimes it's not.

It's great when I see that I would not have hit anything or that I made a good fold to a possible stronger hand. This improves my confidence in my play and makes me feel good about the decision I made.

It's bad when I see that I folded a weak pocket pair and hit trips on the flop. It's worse when I see that I folded a straight or a flush. (Why do I want to question my reason for folding 2-3 suited to a raise that's four times the big blind?? I wonder sometimes too.)

When I see a lot of that, it starts to drive me crazy and makes me play more hands - therefore lessening my chances of going home with cash in my pocket. I start to play hands I previously would have folded, and sometimes end up paying the price.

I'm getting a bit better about controlling the urge, through - so hopefully my play will improve. (Not that I've been doing bad - I could just be doing better.)

So next time I get the urge to run it I'll try to distract myself somehow. Will people mind if I bring porn to the table? (C'mon, what else is going to take my mind off cards?)


Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Fish & Rice

I'm not one for eating fish.

I don't mind it, but it's not the first thing that is going to come to my mind when I look at a menu. (I'm usually looking for the steak and/or ribs section.)

It's the same with rice.

To me, rice is a side dish; not a meal. It's usually the stuff on the plate (beside the veggies) that tends to get ignored while I'm eating. When asked for rice or baked potato, I usually choose rice just because I don't want them ruining a perfectly good potato.

I've had sushi before.

I never really liked it - sometimes it was good and sometimes not. (It's all been store or deli bought) But I have enjoyed it more recently.

My Birthday's coming up soon, and for My Birthday Dinner I've decided that we are going to a sushi restaurant. I've been told by people that it's "10000 times better than anything you'll buy in a store." , so I hope they are not just talking it up.

I'm not sure what to expect - my only experience with a sushi restaurant is the couple of times I've seen that Simpsons episode where Homer eats the poison blowfish. (No "Fugu" for me!) I'm not a complete sushi virgin, I'm just inexperienced in the ways of fish and rice.

I'm sure that I'll enjoy the adventure - heck, I might even go crazy and try something new. But just in case I think I'll pack a steak to eat on the way home. (Is it bad form to ask them to heat it up for me?)


Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Do I Look Like Rick Astley?

I don't think so.

It's been said in the past by the Home Office and The Sidekick, but I think they are full of shit.

At the height of his popularity Rick Astley was a mad smooth pimp who was hounded by the ladies. From that point I can see a certain resemblance.

My singing voice is maybe not as good as Rick's - but only those who have been with me in the shower can testify to that. (The line forms to the left.)

I guess it could be worse. Rick's not a horrible guy, and I'm sure that he is nice enough in person. I'm probably funnier, but that's about all I can bring to the table. (That and the fact I never wore suits with shoulder pads in the Eighties.)

I leave it up to you, Internet.
Please be gentle.


Monday, May 14, 2007

Zen & The Art Of Cleaning One's Garage.

"A Place for Everything and Everything in it's Place."

What utter horseshit.

The modern attached garage isn't really made to house a car. It's meant as a last-stop for items you just haven't thrown out yet. We shouldn't even call it a garage. It should be known as "The Junk Room where we occasionally park the Car." I think that somehow items magically migrate out there during the Fall, and burrow themselves deep, fearing Spring's first light.

Getting started is a daunting task. Where do I begin? I wonder how some of this stuff even got out here. Halfway through I feel like Sisyphus. I almost succumb to the melancholy of it all.

I'm lucky that I have a touch of OCD. I think in situations like this it becomes helpful. That and all the Tetris I played as a kid make me unbeatable in organizational arrangement. (And Mother said video games wouldn't teach me anything!) It's all about sorting and stacking.

When my garbage pile was bigger than I could handle, I decided to call it quits for the day. I can always tackle it again tomorrow. It'll sit until then. (At least I was smart enough to leave the car parked outside.) After all - we must remember my favorite Zen quote:

"Life is a waste of time; time is a waste of life; so why waste your time when you could be having the time of your life?"


Sunday, May 13, 2007

Waiting Is The Hardest Part.

So I get to Poker Night and I'm the first guy there.
Why can't people just be on time?

My other frustration is the people who say they are going to be there, and then beg off saying they don't feel well. You should have thought of that when you said yes earlier, fuckhead. Did you take a dramatic turn for the worse in the last 45 minutes since we last spoke? Cancer flare up or something? We might have turned people down to hold a spot for you. I'm not going to call people and chase them around just to get a game going.

At least some people did show up and I did have a good time.

Fuck you if you couldn't hold it together to make it.

I would have taken all your money anyway.


Saturday, May 12, 2007

Would The Real Betty Ross Please Stand Up?

Liv Tyler has been cast to play Bruce Banner's main squeeze Betty Ross in the upcoming Incredible Hulk movie.

I'm a bit conflicted.

Liv plays cute and intelligent, and she does it really well - But Jennifer nailed her preformance in the first Hulk film. (She was the best thing in it.)

I'd like to see them fight it out - in a pool of baby oil, if possible. (Now that's a movie worth my $10.)

Either way, I win.


Friday, May 11, 2007


I enjoy the iPod.

I use it while at the gym, mowing the lawn, or walking to work. The ability to have my music where I want it when I want it is a welcome relief.

But once again, I just don't understand people.

Three separate times today I witnessed people wearing headphones (ear buds, or whatever) in places that I didn't expect to see them.

  • There was a lady at the Grocery Store today who was walking around, wearing her headphones while she pushed her cart around. I can understand not wanting to be disturbed while you are shopping, but she wasn't even able to hear anyone behind her trying to get by. I looked her in the eyes and said "Hello" and she didn't even begin to respond. That's just rude.
  • I witnessed a guy driving on his motorcycle with his headphones on. I'm pretty sure that not only is it a violation of the motor vehicle code, but pretty stupid as well. How loud would that have to be to hear it over your bike engine? Bye bye hearing.
  • Went out for dinner tonight. While at the restaurant, saw a busboy/dishwasher guy come out from the kitchen, clear some tables and head back. He had his headphones in the whole time. What kind of job is it that lets you do that? How can you have any interaction with your fellow employees when you can't hear them? What if a customer had asked hiim something while he's out on the service floor? "I'm sorry Ma'am - Jimmy can't hear you, he's rocking out to My Chemical Romance." Great excuse.

So like everything else, I think the iPod has it's time and place. I'm going to go out of my way to say hello to every person I see with earphones on. It seems as a society the art of face-to-face communication has been lost. We text, e-mail, and tune each other out. ( I do my best work face-to-face.) It has to stop.

Turn the volume down and say hello.


Thursday, May 10, 2007

Highlight Of My Day:

At work today I accepted a resume from a young man who came in seeking gainful employment with our fine establishment.

Later on I glanced at the resume, and I noticed something.

Under "Qualifications" he had written, in big bold letters,

"I am a Socialist"

Why he would feel that's a qualification to work in a Grocery Store is beyond me. We deal in canned goods and perishables, my friend, not social reform and sit-ins.

Revolutions and Union Meetings?
They're in Aisle 9.


Wednesday, May 09, 2007

My Lawnmower.

My Lawnmower is a piece of shit,
It hurts my back when I push it.

It smokes and groans,
It stalls and dies.
I can cut grass,
But only 2 inches high.

The wheels? They wobble.
The throttle? It's stuck.
It looks like it's been hit by a truck.
I want to chuck it over a cliff -
I'd do it too, but my back is stiff.

I yank the cord to get it to start.
If I pull any harder I'll rupture my heart.
I curse and I swear,
I sound like a sailor.
In a sea of grass,
My lawnmower? Failure.

I'll get a new one,
I will, someday.
But until then,
This piece of shit stays.


Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Calling All Cars....

Lately I find music a bit frustrating.

There's not much out there that intrigues me, and when I do find something, I'm too late and public radio starts to destroy it just weeks after I've discovered it.

I have to either get way ahead of the radio in terms of finding new music, or just give in and fall beneath the behemoth that is Top 40 radio. (Most of the music I'm finding is Canadian, so it's not popularity that screws me so much as Canadian Content laws.) Keep in mind I'm forced to listen to local radio eight hours a day.

I've tried downloading free stuff off iTunes, but the mediocre tends to outweigh the good. I'm stuck waiting until those bands I do love put out some new material. It's driving me mad.

What I need are suggestions.

Let me know about a band so ahead of it's time that to hear of them will make me disbelieve that you are sane. So groundbreaking that I'll be able to enjoy their stuff even after the local radio gets done with it.

(You can't say the Foo, because I already know about them.)

Help me Obi-Wan, you're my only hope.


Monday, May 07, 2007


Homemade Nachos and a movie, right as I get home from work?

Now you're talkin'.

I had grand things to say today, but as you can tell my mind is giving up and my stomach is taking over. If you think that I can compete against a plate of cheesy goodness - well, the only thing I would have less trouble resisting is a plate of donuts or a plate of p****y.

I'm off to dig in.

I'll let you know when the heartburn kicks in.


Sunday, May 06, 2007

Hung Over.

I feel like shit.

Oh, I had a good time, but I'm paying for it now.

(I now recall why I only drink once a year.)

I can't deal with the vast quantities of alcohol anymore.

In my prime, I could drink all night and be bright-eyed the next morning. (I could do a lot of things in my prime that I don't do now.)
Today I feel like I've been kicked in the head and punched in the stomach at the same time.

Needless to say, this calls for a nap.


Saturday, May 05, 2007


Tonight is the Annual Celebration of The Sidekick's Birthday.

He's turning 30.

Having been there myself already, I feel his pain and it is my duty to guide him through this rough time in his life. I'll use my Five more years of life experience to make sure he has an easier time of it than I did. (Remember, I was already done shitting my pants when he was born.)

I've been passing on kernels of wisdom since I've met him, but there are some that I don't want him to forget.
  • Check your zipper before leaving the washroom- otherwise it looks like you are fondling your junk.
  • See that spark of interest in a woman's eye? Watch it disappear when you talk about how much you love Star Wars and Neil Young. (It's okay to love them, just break the news gently.)
  • Chicken Soup is good for the soul, but Tomato Soup is good for what ails you.
  • Karma is a bitch. I know. I used to Date her.
  • Keep your head up and your stick on the ice.
Oh, I've got more, but I'll dole those out as he progresses well into middle age. He'll fight it at first, but then he'll relent and come to accept that his "youthful enthusiasm" is now "childish immaturity".

Come on in buddy, the water's fine.


Friday, May 04, 2007

James Franco's Lazy Eye.

There were 3 things that bugged me about my movie-going experience tonight.

But I'm just going to focus on one of them.

James Franco's lazy eye.

Shit, son!

See an optometrist, opthamologist, whatever. Just see someone. Everytime that fucker was on-screen it was all I could do not to stare at it. The credits should read "Harry Osbourne---James Franco. Lazy Eye --- As Itself." The goddamn eye should get secondary billing. (Do I smell a possible Best Supporting Oscar? Hmm?)

I suspended my disbelief enough to accommodate all the stuff I expected from Spider-Man 3; it didn't include that ocular monstrosity appearing on screen.

Aside from that - it was a great movie. A little slow in parts, but good.

Except for that fucking eye.
I can still see it in my mind, and I left the theater 3 hours ago.
I'm not going to get any sleep tonight.


Tonight's the Night...

As soon as I am off work, I'm going to see Spider-Man 3.

My Spider-sense is tingling...

(My Spider-sense is located right below my belt buckle, in case you are wondering.)


Thursday, May 03, 2007

Hang Up Your Towel.

(Non-Hockey Fans will not get the above reference.)

I just got home from work tonight in time to watch the Vancouver Canucks lose their playoff series to the Anaheim Ducks.

I've stated before that I'm an Avs fan, but the Canucks are the local team I see on T.V. all the time. So it is hard not to feel a little sad when they don't get to move on to the next round. (It was a shitty loss too. I hope Luongo doesn't get the grief that Cloutier got for letting in a blue-line wrister.) I guess the team that worked the hardest for it ended up winning.

Now I'm at a loss of who to cheer for in the West.

I've picked Buffalo in the East. (Not a Canadian team? Shocking!)
I think I'll hold off until the next round starts.

It's tough to stay interested in the playoffs when none of the teams I really like are in it. It's good Hockey, but I like having that personal connection to a team.

Maybe I'll get inspired.
Maybe I'll just drink beer every game.
Either way, I win.


Wednesday, May 02, 2007

When's My Time?

Today I have felt that time is my mortal enemy.

It seems like every time I looked at the clock, it had jumped forwards an hour and I was still stuck doing the stuff Iwas doing when I originally checked out the time.

Hell, I'm behind in what I'm supposed to be doing now. I just thought I'd take time out of my day to bitch about it. (Does that make "My time" right now? If so - it's a bit of a disappointment.)

I just feel like I need some time to zone out and not think about anything.

That would be a relief.


Tuesday, May 01, 2007

I'm Chandler!

which Friends character are you?

You're Chandler...when you're around there's never a quiet moment and no one is safe from your sarcasm.
Take this quiz!

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Does this really surprise anybody?
(And just to be truthful, I haven't watched the show in years.)