Friday, February 09, 2007

No Parking.

Let's give Rats the credit they deserve.

Put those little fuckers in a maze with a piece of cheese and sooner or later you are going to have a happy, well fed Rat.

Maybe Rats should be parking our cars.

I find that anytime I go into any parking lot in town, it's a clusterfuck. People are going the wrong way, trying to put a F-350 into a "small car" zone, and generally just causing mass chaos. My blood pressure rises just watching these assholes at work.

It's because people are fucking lazy.

Is it really that troubling to have to walk a little bit farther to get to the store you want to go to? Do you feel it's imperative to hold up all the traffic behind you so you can wait for that person to give up their spot? It's okay if they were just backing out, but to sit there and wait while they put their belongings away, put their kids in the car, find the keys and eventually back out just so you don't have to park one lane back is retarded. (Oh, sorry - if you were retarded you'd have that primo spot already, right?) Just let the spot go and move on. You'll get it another time, cowboy.

And don't get me started on entrances and exits. With the amount of people I see entering through the exit, I'm amazed anyone gets pregnant anymore. (You see what I did there? The parking/sex analogy? God I'm good.) I guess that big white arrow painted on the ground just isn't direction enough.

We should leave it to the Rats.
A bit of cheese in each parking spot, and all the cars would be lined up neatly.

Probably be a bitch on the upholstery though.


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