Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Dear Michael Bay:

After seeing Transformers last night, I thought I'd write you and let you know my thoughts on the movie.

I was going to write you as soon as I got home from the theater, but cooler heads prevailed and I thought I'd sleep on it.

Why did I have to sleep on it? Just to sort my thoughts out. (And to have at least one sweet dream about Megan Fox.)

I've been reading some comments that people have made about your movie - it seems the detractors were expecting some type of religious experience - I was expecting a Giant Robot Movie - and that's what I got.

Yes, some of the comments about shaky cameras and quick edits are somewhat justified, but if they went into this movie expecting the Robot version of Citizen Kane then I think they may have set their sights too high.

I can almost imagine your to-do list while making this movie, Michael:
  • Giant Robots? - Check.
  • Likable Human Hero? (Well played by Shia LaBeouf.) - Check.
  • Hot Lead Actress? - Check!
  • Stunning, Well Thought Out Plot?
  • More Explosions Than the Big Bang? - Double Check.
Really, what more did you need?

For all those who may complain to you about raping their childhood Michael, I suggest you buy them tickets to the one or two theaters that are still showing Spider-Man 3 and ask them which movie makes them feel more violated. I believe you did the best you could (which was well done) while trying to stay close to the source material and yet giving the studio what they feel the public wants. Thank God you didn't throw in a dance number. (Take that, Sam Rami!)

So to get right down to it - I liked it. It fulfilled what I expected, and was entertaining as a whole.
I'll buy it on DVD when it comes out, and I'd even spring for a Special Edition.

Thanks again Mike, (can I call you Mike?) I hope that the movie does well, and all the haters have mysterious car troubles - those that don't still depend on their Mom and Dad for a ride.


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