Tuesday, February 19, 2008

I Want To Be A Rock Star..

More importantly, I want to be an 80's Rock Star.

You see, being a Rock Star nowadays has it's drawbacks. You are constantly in the public eye, held accountable for your beliefs and actions, and expected to lend your support to a number of worthwhile causes.

80's Rock Stars didn't have to do any of that. Did you ever hear anyone ask Kip Winger what he thought about the starving kids in Africa? Hell no - he was too busy singing Seventeen and banging hot chicks to care if some kid missed a couple of meals.

Sure, the paparazzi watched Tommy Lee, and reported what he was doing - but who cared? You could have printed that he was drunk out of his mind, bought some coke and went home with 3 women and people would have just shook there heads and said "That Tommy". Vince Neil even killed a guy and all he got was probation.

That kind of reckless, unaccountable, morally corrupting lifestyle is mighty inviting, don'tcha think?

My only problems would be the spandex, makeup, and hair. If I have trouble telling the difference between my band mates and the groupies, somethings wrong. I'd hate to grab the first thing I see when I get off stage and find it's got the same tackle as me.

Yes, there are perks and pitfalls, but I'd be willing to try it out for a while at least. I just have to work on "Throwing the Horns" and my extended guitar solos. Do you think Guitar Hero would help with that?


See you at the reunion tour.



  1. Anonymous12:54 am

    dear bernard,
    i wanted to share this with you.

  2. Absolutely awesome.

    "Bring to me your leather, take from me my lace."

    Dave rocks.