Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Write Your Rider.

Ah, the life of a Rock Star.

Not only only do you get to do a job that you love, see the world, and have mindless sex with hawt groupies, you also, (if you are a big enough Rock Star) get to ask for whatever you want just to preform.

The Smoking Gun has a collection of concert performance contracts from a lot of bands/ performers. The parts they display are what the artists " need " in regards to dressing rooms, food, security, etc. These are called "riders" and some of the shit people ask for are fucking crazy.
  • Foo Fighters - Boxer Shorts and Tube Socks. At least Dave keeps his shit neat.
  • Pearl Jam - Fresh Fruit for making smoothies (Eddie has his own blender), and no Glow Lite merchandise to be sold at the concert.
  • Eminem - "Game Room" with big screen T.V. and PlayStation. Arcade games, portable basketball hoop, and don't forget the masseuse.
  • Mariah Carey - Cristal Champagne and bendy straws.
  • Chili Peppers - The Tube Socks were a given, but Aromatherapy Candles?

Here's your chance. What do you ask for? Forget the beer and cigarettes, and skip the homemade sandwiches. If you were going out to rock the arena, what would you want in your dressing room when you got back?

I'd ask for some real exotic, hard to find kinda shit. Like fresh squeezed Root Beer and milk from cows whose names start with an X. I'd also ask for a rock hard bean bag chair, and for all the water to be served at 24 degrees Fahrenheit but not frozen. Oh, I'd make it challenging for those people.

God, I'm a Bastard sometimes.

So what would you like?


1 comment:

  1. oh, there'd so have to be a hot tub. One cannot have proper groupie parties without a hot tub.

    I'll settle for the portable kind.