Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Making A List, Checking It Twice...

What's with all the lists?

Always at this time of year, people start coming out with their "Best of" and "Worst of" lists.
Here's a question, Who Fucking Cares?

You know I'm the last guy to bitch about a list of stuff. Hell I enjoy telling you all how I feel in list form quite often. But what drives me nuts is that these lists are everywhere. Every publication has a list, every sect and organization has a list, every fucking retard with an opinion and a form of communication feels the need to tell you how his favorite things stacked up this year. Half the time its all the same shit, or at least the same type of crap as the year before. It's easy to do; check it out.

Favorite Shit From Last Year:

  1. Just about every blowjob I received. ( There were a few so-so, but why complain?)
  2. DVD's
  3. Random Music.

Favorite Shit From This Year:

  1. Just about every blowjob I received.
  2. DVD's
  3. Random Music.

So what's changed? Nothing! Sure, some of the movies and music might be different, but it's still the same list. Why? Because I like Movies and Music, (and blowjobs) that's never gonna change.

The only list that should be acceptable is changes from the norm.

I know you like movies, so don't tell me that shit. Tell me the best new food you tried, or a list of the easiest women you know, or something that will make the list useful to me. I don't care if you liked Harry Potter, millions of other people did too, I get the picture, it's a good movie. But if you tell me the best new dish you tried was scallops and bacon eaten off the ass of a 21-year old personal trainer, then I might be interested in trying that out.

Make sure to keep that in mind when creating your list, and everything should be just fine.

And pass the bacon.

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