But Can It Wipe My Ass?

Chatting with others about cellphones tonight.
One of the individuals, (who does not have a cell,) says "I'll get one when is has GPS and a MP3 player, that's what I need."
Nowadays it seems like every commercial for a cellphone touts some new advancement or innovation. First it was ringtones, then cameras, now TV and videos. When is it going to end?
( I have to say I'm a fan of the phone/mp3 combo, just so I have only one device to carry.)

What would you like to see in a cellphone? Any type of outrageous add-on? How far are the companies willing to go to capture more customers?

My forecast for the future:

• Buy the phone, get a blowjob. (Most successful product rollout ever.)
• For the ladies - special "attachment" for your vibrating phone, uses 15 minute ringtone.
• The Dick Tracy wristwatch cellphone.
• Cellphone Gun.- Great for the mean streets of the 'Shwa.
• The Loser cellphone - preloaded hawt chicks numbers, and they've already call-blocked you.
• The DIY cellphone - box of parts, instructions in ancient hieroglyphics.
• The G.W. Bush Cellphone - Just one big button with daddy on speed dial.

Some great ideas, eh? If any of these come out soon I'll know that Nokia's been scanning the blog. Who knows what kind of crap they'll throw out next, and being the consumer whores we are, some jerk-wad will pay big money for it.

Writing this has reminded me, I have to go charge my cell, luckily the wife's vibrator uses the same adapter.......

(She'll be pissed if she reads this.)