The Couch

Behold, all Ye,
The Couch at work.
It is not much,
But it's a perk.

It is where I rest my cheeks,
After dealing with the wild and meek.
Of customer service I do speak,
Helping people find what they seek.

Upstairs is where the couch doth lay,
In a corner, tucked away.
Shaded by a plant that's fake,
But in my mind, it's by a lake.

A lake, you see, so cool and blue,
Where no one tells you what to do.
Where no one wants to bitch and ache,
Because they can't find the Shake n' Bake.

The couch, while it does the best it can,
Does not compare to the Gym and a Tan.
Sure, it's good for a brief rest,
But how do I work my calves and chest?

Of this couch, I do fear,
What goes on when I'm not here.
If it was used for knockin' boots,
I'd not want to sit there, that's the truth.

But sit there I do,
And rest my feet,
While eating my lunch,
I'm quiet and discrete.

Where it came from,
I do not know,
But I think I saw a wet spot,
And now it's time to go.

I think I'll go downstairs,
I won't be angry or meaner,
I'll just go down the household aisle,
And get the upholstery cleaner.

I will not clean the spot I saw,
I'll put the cleaner by the door.
You see, there's a teenager working tonight,
And that's what he is for.

I would like the couch to be clean,
As clean as best we can,
So I can rest my weary head,
And dream I'm a Kenyan.

In my dreams, I'd run so fast -
Of my speed there is no doubt.
Unfortunately when I wake up,
I'll still be on the couch.

Later.