The Plank.

Hey Fatty.

Wanna try something? I'll bet your fat ass can't do it.
It's easy - you don't even have to move.

Take the burrito out of your mouth and lay on the floor.
Yeah, that's right - lay down. On your stomach. (Don't worry, we're not doing the scene from Deliverance.)

Ready?

Put your hands together like your praying, and put your legs straight out like you're going to do a push-up. (No actual push-ups today, tons-o-fun - one torture at a time.)

Now lift your tubby gut off the floor and hold your body straight - like a board.

That's it. That's all you have to do.

Just hold it for one minute.
Just sixty seconds.

Feel the core of your body starting to shake?
Is gravity pulling that massive donut you call a waist to the floor?
Keep it straight now.

Back starting to cramp? Breathing heavy? Breaking a sweat? Remember, all you are doing is not moving.

Ten seconds more...

...And you're done.


Hardest fucking exercise I've ever done.


Later.