Friday, October 29, 2010


The image to the right has me conflicted in so many ways.

There's a lot that I like:
  1. Hot woman? Check.
  2. Stockings? Um - yeah, Check.
  3. Skintight Dress, practically glued to her body? Check. (Is it hot in here or is it just me?)
  4. Heels? Check.
  5. Big Bird perched on her head like a Brain Slug from Futurama? Check.
(Yes - I list the Brain Slug look as a positive thing - anything that references Futurama is okay in my books.)

And some stuff that I find troubling:

  1. She's dressed like Big Bird.
  2. Big Bird appears to have crammed his beak into her cranium, completely rendering her incapable of thought.
  3. She's dressed like Big Bird if he was transformed into a nymphomaniac slut. (I really had problems putting this in the "negative" category.
  4. She's dressed like fucking Big Bird.

Now for the longest time, I've been completely fine with the "slutty" or "sexy" trend in Halloween costumes. Slutty Mail carrier, Slutty Teacher, Slutty Nurse, Slutty CSI, Slutty Jedi (oh I wish).. you get the idea. But the line has to be drawn somewhere, and I guess this is it for me.

Sure, you can parody the ambiguous relationship Bert and Ernie have, and even make fun of Oscar the Grouch as a belligerent drunk - but making Big Bird (and Elmo too, believe it or not - I've seen pictures) sexy and trashy is just wrong. Big Bird is the most child-like and innocent of all the Sesame Street characters - as far away from sexy as can be.

If I see a woman dressed in this, am I going to look? Hell yes - I'm a man after all. But I'd feel reaaaallllly bad about it afterwards. (Hey, maybe if I asked nice, she'd take it off...)


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