Monday, June 06, 2005

If you don't have anything nice to say...

It must be my face.
I must have one of those faces that just screams "Tell me more"
I have no idea why people (Customers) feel the need to tell me the most intimate details of their life when purchasing a product.
Case in point. " I need to get Epsom Salts for my rash, The doctor said I should soak my posterior in the tub for a little bit each night."
"I'm buying these groceries because my cousins-uncles-former-best-friends-roommate-who-I-don't-really-like-because-she's-a-manipulative-bitch-who-smokes-and-curses-but-she's-only-in-town-for-two-days-to-testify-at-her-child-custody-hearing is coming over for dinner."
I don't care.
I'll assist a customer in anyway I can, within the context of the grocer/customer relationship. If you need a suggestion for an entree or dessert and would like to tell me what else is on the menu so I can best help you, fine. I don't need to hear the intimate details of why you are cooking an "I'm sorry" dinner for your wife, regardless who or what you stuck your dick into that got you in trouble in the first place.
On a similar tangent, people who stop and talk to other people (customers) in the store. Please realize that even though you are talking to only one person, if you keep using your BIG BOY VOICE, we can hear you on the other side of the produce section. I guess passing that secret along and asking your buddy to keep it on the "down low" is pointless after you've broadcast it in a public place.
But don't worry, I won't tell anyone.

1 comment:

  1. Yes, the grocer/customer relationship. This has huge parallels across the entire service/shopping sector.

    I mean, when can one hit on the Starbuck's girl, and is it really something that's anytime-okay becuase it never means anything? How about the ticket girl at the airport counter -- is that okay too? (okay, bad example)

    But the separation of Church and State - that is, between work and play - means that friendly relationships within one context become awkward at another.

    I'm certainly not going to say "Yo, buddy, how's the Pylonidal Cyst doing?" when you're working at Subway, for instance, but I am gonna say "Hey man, phone me later at my mom's place", for instance; I know where that line is, and I know why I don't wanna cross it. But for the divas and the divine stuck in a hairnet and coffee-bean job, where's the line? If I seem them outside of work, should I ignore them until they make the first move? Keep it light even then, for sure, and not even think about the cheezy moves I'd played at trying last week, for sure.

    (As I've so wanted to write in my blog many, many times: "Look: I'm not an idiot. I'm gonna sit across from her, chew my food with my mouth closed, laugh at her fucking jokes, and that's it." )

    So is that it? Is that valid within the vendor/buyer relationship and outside of it? I think so. I mean, we gotta be nice to our servers when it's the end of a 12-hour 8-and-4 split and they're just staggering out to the car: You just don't wanna be asking them how they get the caramel into the caramilk bar, for instance; they're done. Tired. Punched out, so piss off, right? But you can say "Hey buddy, thanks for the help earlier, avaguwun or so, right?

    Fock dess. I'm blogging the fucking thing, I've written so much. Don't go there if you've read this far, for it'll just be a copy-and-paste, like so much of my shit. Man, the amount of time I spend riding the coat-tails of the truly gifted...