MidlifeRamblers Episode 7: Mastery of the Geek Haiku.

Oh yeah, we ramble on about Transformers too. (And everything else in our worldview, too.)




Later.

Thank You, Vancouver.

• For being cheerful and fun while I was there. Keep this up, and that "No Fun City" label will disappear fast.
• For having a transit system that worked perfectly, and wasn't a pain in the ass to navigate.
• For cleaning up and shining - looking like a true International City.
• For having all those people in Blue Jackets around - who don't mind giving directions to a guy who's "got his buzz on".
• For a Tim Horton's, Starbucks, or other caffeinated beverage place available when I stopped drinking Gin.
• For being the Gateway to Poco, where the real party was.. hahaha.

I'll be back in a month, so don"t forget about me..



Later.

Buck MotherFucking Rogers.

What's one of the greatest birthday gifts a guy from my generation could get?

(Unless you guessed the A-Team Van or the General Lee, you'd have to pick this.)

Buck Motherfucking Rogers.

You see, of the fabled geeky tv shows from my childhood, two of them stand out from the fog of memory. Battlestar Gallactica was one, and Buck Rogers was the other.

After Star Wars came and blew our minds in 1977, there had to be something to fill the void that was left until George Lucas stopped counting money and decided to make a sequel.

Buck Rogers filled the void.

I was at that age where I was old enough to appreciate Buck's stranger-in-a-strange-land quandary, and yet still naive enough to wonder why Colonel Wilma Deering made me feel funny in my pants.

The show had everything: humor, action, a hinted at sexual tension between Wilma and Buck, and a fucking robot that walked around carrying another robot like Flava Flav wears a clock. (The fact is, I think Flava owes Twiggy & Dr. Theopolis a shout out for the inspiration.) Combine that with different hostile alien races and exptic worlds, and it was enough to keep me sitting four inches from the T.V for a hour once a week.

Big props to The Sidekick for picking this gem up for me for my Birthday - even bigger props for giving it to me early as he won't be here on the fabled day.

I can't wait to sit down and watch my childhood appear again before my eyes in all it's chessy glory. What I can wait for is the uncomfortable dream of a three-way with Deering and Twiggy I know is going to happen.



Later.

Youth and Young Manhood.

Happy Birthday, Sidekick - you beautiful son of a bitch.

Now before you go wondering why I would call my best friend by such foul terms, let me tell you that I have only the utmost regard for the man. He is, after all, the Hetro-Lifemate.

The reasons I call him beautiful are as follows:

• He's not completely fugly. There are women out there who find him attractive and charming. (Go figure.)
• He's got the soul of a saint, the heart of a poet, and the penis of a miniature schnauzer. (I'm calling the last one by what I heard through the grapevine. I have no first hand knowledge of this.)
• He's been my rock, my backup, my confidant, and my moral compass.
• He just received tickets to the Kings of Leon concert in Vancouver and asked me to go.

Oh yeah.

Lets look at that last one for just a second. Savor it, soak it in.

(Pause)

The Fucking Kings of Leon! Sweet Mary Mother of God and All that is Holy - The Kings of Leon.
For me, right now in my musical evolution, this is one of the top 3 bands I would Give My Left Nut to see. (Please note that the Sidekick did not ask for said nut, nor did he make any mention of my nuts as a form of currency.)

Thank God he gave me 3 months warning - now I can make sure I have the time off, the cash, and build up my stamina for the event.

Hold on a sec - I have to wait three months to go to this concert? Every day is going to be like molasses, endlessly dragging on until the day of the show.

Curse you, Sidekick - for giving me the musical equivalent of Blue Balls - I can go, but I have to wait for it. I'll have a stereophonic hard-on for the next 98 days.

God, my Zune is going to take a pounding.


Thank you, Sidekick - even with the wait, I still think you're one beautiful, glorious bastard.


Happy Birthday.




Later.

Port Coquitlam in a Nutshell...

• Woody's Pub: Rock Pub, Couger Bar, crazy people. Sang "Don't Stop Believeing" and "Jesse's Girl" at the top of my lungs.


• Unknown Country Bar: Yes, I went there - Bar Band plays Def Leppard. In country, no less - I think Joe Elliot would be shocked to hear "Hysteria" with a harmonica.
• Denny's @ 3am : And I thought Sally Jo's was bad, back in the day...


• IHOP: Not what you'd think. I was disapointed. Full, but disapointed.


• Coquitlam Centre Mall: More people than I can shake a stick at, and they were all in my way. Every store was crowded, and walking was a chore.

More when I get back.....

Later.

Holiday....

I must be doing something right - my first day of holidays are sunny and nice.
(Cold as Fuck in the morning, but I'm not going to complain about that.)

I originally booked these holidays to help the Sidekick move - but since we did all the big stuff a couple of weeks ago, I'm just going to go over to The City and hang.

There's going to be poker, comics, and probably the occasional Gin or Beer. (Oh Noes!) It'll be cool to just kick back and roll - old skool style. Of course it's not completely old school, 'cause back in the day I'd sleep in on a hungover Sunday morning - this time I'm making him take me to his Gym. (Sad, isn't it?)

I have to go to the Gym, he said his new place is down the road from an IHOP. (How the hell am I supposed to resist that?)


If all goes well, I leave Saturday morning and come back sometime Monday/ Tuesday. I think after 3-4 days with the Sidekick in the Big Smoke, I'm going to need another holiday just to recuperate.

Can't wait.




Later.

Giving Up The Game.

I have to stop playing NHL 09.

Not by choice, mind you.

You see, the copy I have isn't really mine - it's the Sidekick's, and I've just been using it while he was away from his Xbox. Now that he is situated in The Big City, I have to give it back.

And therein lies my problem.

At first it wasn't a big deal, as I'd received a Futureshop gift card for Christmas, and was planning on getting the game with that when I returned the Sidekick's copy. (No problem, right?)

But then I spent the gift card on DVD's. Some in January, and the rest just the other day.
( I got this sweet deal on The Adventures of Baron Munchhausen & Ghostbusters 1&2 - how do you pass that up?)

So now I will be without my Hockey fix until Payday. And that seems like an eternity away.

You have to understand, this is a game that I play religiously. Every day, at least once. It's addictive. Giving this up cold turkey will be harder than quitting smoking and masturbating at the same time. (Impossible, right?)

So wish me luck.

I'm gonna need it.



Later.

Departure.

We loaded up the Sidekick's stuff today - he's off to the big city.

I think he had even more crap than I did - and I lived in a house, not a one-bedroom apartment. (To be fair- he's been in that place a long time.)

The best find:

This cover - just picture a band across the corner that says "Gretzky Retires" and there will be no confusion as to how long this particular piece of literature has been sitting in his apartment. He started calling it a Pop Culture Archive, what with all the Rolling Stone and Entertainment Weekly laying around, but I think it was more of a explosion of geekiness - a Nerdgasm, if you will.

And now it's packed up and gone.

I'll admit - I'm a bit sad.

It should be okay, though - he's coming back to tidy and finish some final stuff at the end of the month, and I'll go over and stay in the Big Smoke for a couple of days when he heads back. After that, I'll have to live vicariously through his exploits via Facebook. (At least until I can get over there again.)

I wonder if Skipper felt like this when Gilligan left the island?

We'll never know.




Later.